This letter is a little window into my world. I’ve synthesized my 10 most memorable happenings of 2018 and invite you to celebrate and mourn the deep matters of my heart as I vision even more balance, pleasure and awakening in 2019.
10. ADDICTION IS A FAMILY AFFLICTION
We started the first week of the year in the emergency room, not knowing if my brother, Carlos, was going to survive a pancreatitis attack. This episode catapulted me, Michel and my mother into a year-long journey in Alanon which taught me invaluable lessons about acceptance, detachment, personal responsibility, and prayer. It has given me tools to better relate to not only my brother, but Michael’s father, and many of my lovers who use and sometimes abuse the now legal, Marijuana. Most importantly, Alanon helped me fast from my own addiction to drama.
9. THE JOY OF PARENTING
On Devin’s 11th Birthday, uncle Christian took the family on a pleasure trip to Vegas to see Cirque Du Sole! Devin is a student leader in Kung fu and loves to play Dungeons and Dragons with the neighborhood friends. He performed Keyboard in the school rock band and graduated from elementary with honors. Adjusting to advanced classes in Middle school has been challenging, but he loves math and is learning to play the Trombone. As a boys bonding trip, Michael took Devin to the Matterhorn in Switzerland. Next year, we are visioning the first ISTA Family Fusion experiment in West Virginia.
8. FALLING IN LOVE AGAIN AND AGAIN
Michael and I stood on a mount in Israel, on the equinox and he made a love declaration that came straight from his soul:
We vow to contribute to peace on earth, by cultivating peace in our relationship.
Michael is in the midst of a major spiritual upgrade that started when he went to ISTA’s practitioner training, then deepened at his first Core gathering. This work continues to ripple into every area of his life, transforming his relationship to: money, work, creativity, parenting, and especially our relationship! In addition to selling solar and running the short-term vacation rentals, Michael is taking songwriting and singing lessons, and co-creating the curriculum for our new relationship master course. Our mutual devotion is a profound foundation from which we both can contribute to the collective.
7. LOVE IN EVERY PORT
Both Michael and I are balancing co-parenting with time alone, each other, and tending to our local relationships, (which even includes experimenting on Tinder.) As we travel around the planet, we have a nurtured a number of lovers in Portland, Sweden, and Hawaii. And sometimes our paths Criss-cross with gypsies like MIA in Brazil ;)
After many years of long distance relating, my soul sister RIA finally moved to San Diego with her beloved Kenny! Instead of a 7-year itch ceremony, ROXANNE and I evolved our relationship to a deeper soul connection. We released the structure of our standing Friday dates and decided to focus on our friendship, fast from drama and of course, celebrate becoming published co-authors!
I’ve also enjoyed ongoing sapiosexual writing dates with DANIEL and CHERI.
On my birthday, I reprioritized
my bond with JAMES and SHARMILA, who I’ve been dating off and on for the last 3 years, we’ve enjoyed monthly playdates, family time and traveling together
The highlight was marching in San Diego’s Pride Festival with my Polyamory Pod including JENNIFER, JESSE, TAHL, ALEX, TOREE & KAMELA, which was about the same time showtime decided to re-run of back-to-back episodes of our TV show: Polyamory: Married & Dating!
6. 11-WEEK ISTA TOUR & TANTRA FESTIVALS
Despite the mixed feelings I held about leaving home for so long, I surrendered to serve my dharma and the universe presented me with amazing opportunities to offer my gifts in Hawaii, Portland, Sweden, Brazil, New York, and the exciting climax was teaching my first Level 2 in Israel with Ohad and Rex. This is the shamanic death initiation where we learn to dance with the Void. Perhaps the deepest harvests from all my travel was learning to move deeper into mythic time. Why decompress when I can continue journeying? Instead of crashing after the big trip, and getting depressed as I usually do after a big energy drain, I felt more energized. I find more and more mystery in the mundane. Even the airport and bathroom has become magical portals for inner travel. In 2019, I’ve been called to do one week of training for every three weeks home. I can’t believe I already have 9 ISTA trainings on the calendar for 2019.
5. LOCAL HAPPENINGS
With all this international travel, I tend to nest and rest when I’m home, but Michael and I managed to pull off a few local events such as Keynoting at Polytopia in Portland, Speaking about Diversity and Embodiment and at the Purpose summit in San Francisco, and the Bisexual forum at SDSU (Where my beloved Michael finally came out of the bi closet ;) I even made a guest appearance at Z Griss’s one-woman show in New York!
4. “SURROUND YOURSELF WITH GREATNESS”
I’m honored to be working with a high level inner circle of authors, coaches, and leaders in the Love Leadership Mentorship & mastermind program. And DRUMROLL PLEASE…this year Michael and I are creating a deep dive for partners to make a sincere commitment to stop relating at the level of personality so they can see how their partnership can be guided and informed at the level of soul, we plan to launch it around Valentines (our 17-year anniversary.)
3. RADIANT WHOLENESS:
Last year’s #1 new years resolution was to meditate every morning before screen time and after a month of meditating at the ocean, I started jogging to the pier and actually have a daily practice that continued through my travels! Being gluten-free has reduced chronic pain and inflammation so that I could feel the inherent pleasure of exercise. My mood swings have also leveled out and although I am still a sensitive empath, I’m not as easily seduced into the story of separation. To fight the holiday blues and support my brother’s recovery, I’m going to the NAD clinic to get IV therapy.
2. FOUR WEDDINGS AND A FUNERAL (ALMOST)
In Portland, I was honored to perform a poly shibari wedding for my Swedish co-facilitator Patrik and his beautiful bride Anna. On Sept 26th, I flew home from Israel just in time to bless my brother Miguel as he married Kim, and that was on the same day that Tahl and Alix tied the knot.
I did not make it to my dear friend Kevin & Celene’s wedding ceremony because it was on the same day my Grandmother Terry turned 100 years old! She says her secret to long life is to: “Be happy and help others.
Earlier this year, I got an intuitive hit to reach out to my art/activist friend, Mukeee Okan only days before she left this world. I’m honored to have gotten her permission to immortalize her art on the cover of my soon to be published anthology “Secret Lives of Sex Shamans.” We live on through the people we touch and the art we create!
#1 I JUST SIGNED ANOTHER PUBLISHING DEAL!
I have always wanted to be a published author with a real trade publisher. All four of my previous books have been self-published so I’ve been in charge of printing, packaging, marketing, etc! (Including 2 translations, the Portuguese version of my book with Baba Dez just came out this year, check out: http://amzn.to/1QmVGEV)
Self-publishing has been a huge humbling endeavor. So with the help of my friend and agent Bobby Newman, I started pitching my book(s) to publishers until Cleis Press bought my book! Their LBTGQ niche is perfect for the erotic Novel based on my true love story with Roxanne Depalma. You may remember the book was going to be titled: 52 Fridays with my Bitch, but we decided to drop the Bitch. So 52 Fridays is due: Winter 2020!
This exciting news came on the heels of having also signed with Inner Traditions and Bear & Co. to publish my forthcoming anthology of stories from the ISTA Tribe (See www. SexShaman.com) Due: Spring/Summer 2019!
I can hardly believe that I signed TWO book contracts this year and will be doing a tour and with your help, will make them bestsellers next year!
Wake up & Dream,
P.S. If you want to finally write your own book in 2019 check out my new online course: How to write a book in 90 days!