Reid Mihalko, Diana Adams and Kamala Devi come together on this Polyamory tele-conference to answer even your hardest questions about…
…open relationships, jealousy, meeting poly people, scheduling, dealing with poly family. And Lots more. They’ll be teaching together LIVE at PolyPalooza a 4 day festival for Free Lovers. (You can Skip the orientation and start at 1:45)
We had over 90 people sign up for this Polyamory Teleconference, who wrote in with over 40 difficult relationship questions. Here is a summary of some of they asked:
ON JEALOUSY IN POLYAMORY
Jealousy. I understand. I know my partner deserves his own piece of the pie, WITHOUT me freaking out, but I still freak out. This is the first big one for my partner, and I am terrified and enraged [feeling betrayed] what are the small measurable, tangible steps we can take, to let us work through it. we’re sinking.
I feel very happy for my lover to meet his other lover but he doesn’t feel the same when I meet my other lover. So I feel like the relationship is unbalanced. Any suggestions?
What tips can you offer about detecting jealousy pangs in your significant other before it becomes destructive and a major issue?
Since We didn’t have time to answer all the questions asked on this Polyamory Teleconference, perhaps you can offer your answers in the comments below. Thank you!
ON CONFILICT-RESOLUTION IN MULTIPLE RELATIONSHIPS
When do you introduce your main to a secondary partner? What if at first the partners like each other in a V and then later they don’t?
How quickly or how soon do you share with your lover that you’re getting sexually intimate with someone else? Do you pause the moment with the new person you’re getting intimate with in order to call your other lover and tell them? What’s the best way to handle disclosing such info when you find yourself in an unexpected sensual encounter?
Can a poly relationship work of one partner has rules/limitations and the other has no limitations?
What about when the problem isn’t rooted in romance, but finance, when there’s conflict over money and ownership of assets?
How do we keep up our self confidence while being judged by mainstream haters?
How do I know if I am polyamorous or just bored with my monogamous relationship?!
Once you struggle with not only jealousy, envy, and/or insecurity, but also conflicts (arguments, boundaries, etc.), how do you eliminate and avoid them in addition to polyamorous relationships?
Where can we meet single females to date?
Where can I find quality Poly candidates to start a bigger family?
I’m bi. How do I find poly men and women to date? I live in LA – don’t know where to find like minded people and the poly dating sites are really sparse.
How do you know polyamory is right for you?
what is most important in play …body , soul , environment or the spirit?
How do you make enough ttime for everyone (lovers) in your lives?
How do you manage time to nurture all your relationships and yourself (and please don’t say “google calendar!”
How do you maintain or grow the intimate connection with your primary, without limiting the number of partners or time spent with them?
How do you develop intimacy with a partner or partners (other than your primary) without putting distance between you and your primary.
I have a very busy schedule and would like to balance so that I can explore growing my sex life which is currently stagnant while maintaining my work/family responsibilities. Are there suggestions on how I may be forthcoming and direct with my desires?
ON POLYAMORY FAMILY
What is the best way to deal with family members who don’t accept and cause severe issues within the extended family due to a poly relationship…right now we do not have any contact with most of them and feel that in the long run it will hurt our children.
For Diana Adams, how difficult is it to obtain a three parent legal rights document ? My finances have three children and we want to have me have legal rights to them and I’ve seen things online allowing the third parent and also we plan for me to have one and I want to just start the process as us all three parents I saw something online about that but how about would you start that process … The help with that would be tremendous !!! I have many but those two are very important.
Whatever comes to mind for considerations in asexual relations with primary partner in poly relating?MISC. QUENSTIONS about Open Relationships
How to heal heartbreak with a non-poly x-love gone hater?
How do you express love to those you are not sexual with, perhaps not even attracted to as personalities.
Do you feel polyamory is the natural state for humanity?
What about poly relationships across generations, races, continents? what about them? can we talk about them?
My boyfriend and i have been dating five years and he recently told me that he has always known polyamory was right for him. I am trying to accept it, but I am afraid that if we date several people that I wouldn’t be his “main”female girlfriend. As Kamala Devi has three lovers, I always viewed her husband as her “main” lover and the other two are just lovers. Is this a bad mindset to go off of? Also, my boyfriend said we can’t have any boys in poly, so I am limited to dating girls only. I am bisexual, so I don’t mind females, but I feel like he is being quite unfair. Is it normal to exclude a gender in poly?
QUESTIONS ABOUT POLY PALOOZA
I have been to most of the TantraPalooza’s, what will be the same and what will be different? What awesome stuff do we get to do again, and what can I look forward to doing for the first time?